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I write comic book reviews that NOBODY has ever asked for!
March 2018
batman (13)
BOOBS! (7)
punisher (7)
Retro Reviews (7)
Someone Punch That Giant Robot!! (7)
captain america (6)
green hornet (6)
jonah hex (6)
Kato (6)
One shots (6)
Where did all these robots come from? (6)
x-files (6)
aliens (5)
star wars (5)
wolverine (5)
azrael (4)
Grant Morrison is insane (4)
hellboy (4)
Two Shots (4)
Zorro (4)
batman and robin (3)
Damian Wayne (3)
deathblow (3)
dick grayson (3)
Excuses! (3)
Hex (3)
iron man (3)
joker (3)
Lone Ranger (3)
Minimum Effort! (3)
predator (3)
red sonja (3)
Tonto (3)
avengers (2)
Bat Lash (2)
Battle for the cowl (2)
conan (2)
Count Dracula (2)
dark horse (2)
El Diablo (2)
Flashpoint (2)
gen 13 (2)
Ghost Rider 2099 (2)
planet of the apes (2)
ragman (2)
robin (2)
spider-man (2)
superman (2)
Tallulah Black (2)
Topps (2)
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x-men (2)
30 days of night (1)
Adventures in the Rifle Brigade (1)
alex ross (1)
Amalgam (1)
An android saves the day AGAIN (1)
Are nuns supposed to show that much cleavage? (1)
Aren't there any pictures of Walter Koenig to reference? (1)
Astonishing Tales (1)
Batman Inc. (1)
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black widow (1)
blackhawks (1)
boba fett (1)
Brave and Bold (1)
Bruce Wayne Returns (1)
Bucky Barnes saves the universe (1)
Calculator (1)
Cannibalistic Aztec Mummy Brain Eatin' Mad Scientist OH MY! (1)
Captain Phasma (1)
Combat Kelly (1)
Cowboy Western (1)
daredevil (1)
dark reign (1)
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Doc Savage (1)
Doctor Aphra (1)
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dracula (1)
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Exploding radioactive zombies! OH MY! (1)
fantastic four (1)
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Hitler's missing testicle (1)
Holy Giant Typewriter Batman! (1)
huntress (1)
I just want to be pretty (1)
idw (1)
In Soviet Russia Giant Robot Punch YOU (1)
invaders (1)
Iron Man 2020 (1)
joe kubert (1)
Joker with a hobo beard (1)
Kevin Eastman Flips Off The World! (1)
kevin smith (1)
Kung Fu Star Wars (1)
Lady Zorro (1)
legion of monsters (1)
lobo (1)
Magnus Robot Fighter (1)
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Marvel MAX (1)
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mass effect (1)
Mass Effect Andromeda (1)
Matt Wagner has some 'splaining to do! (1)
Mojoworld (1)
Nazi flying saucers (1)
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nightwing (1)
Nomad (1)
Nuns With Guns (1)
Operation Bollock (1)
oracle (1)
oriental shaved gorilla pirates (1)
Our Army at War (1)
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Princess Leia wearing a trucker cap (1)
Project Superman (1)
Punching Giant Monsters (1)
ra's al ghul (1)
red hood (1)
Richard Corben (1)
Ruse (1)
Russian Speaking Gorillas with machine guns (1)
Sam Wilson (1)
Shanna The She Devil (1)
Silver (1)
simon bisley (1)
Solomon Kane (1)
Someone punch that giant space God! (1)
Space Vampires! (1)
Space: Above and Beyond (1)
Spider- Man (1)
spirit (1)
Squid rape is still rape (1)
star trek (1)
Star Trek: The Next Generation (1)
superboy (1)
Superman Huffs Joker Gas (1)
swamp thing (1)
Team 7 (1)
teenage mutant ninja turtles (1)
terminator (1)
the a-team (1)
The Assassin (1)
The Avenger (1)
The Burning Earth (1)
the crow (1)
the flash (1)
the goon (1)
The Huntress (1)
The Rocketeer (1)
the thing (1)
Tomb of Dracula (1)
Tor (1)
transformers (1)
Unplugging computers destroys them right? (1)
venom (1)
vertigo (1)
Vlad The Impaler (1)
Wait! Why is Robin in Green Hornet? (1)
Wait! Why is there a TANK in this western? (1)
Warrior Nun Areala (1)
Weird War Tales (1)
What If? (1)
What were they smoking? (1)
Where did these ninjas come from? (1)
Who's that guy pretending to be Azrael? (1)
Why is Luke Skywalker's skin green? (1)
Why is the friggin' sky YELLOW? (1)
Wild West Batman (1)
Winter World (1)
wonder woman (1)
X (1)
Zombies (1)

So what we have here is a five issue standalone story that crosses over between the regular Marvel Star Wars and Doctor Aphra ongoing series, with an introductory one-shot.  It can be read on its own, but a bit of background knowledge on both Star Wars and Doctor Aphra is needed to fully get into it. . .but really all you need to know are the following basic bits:

Luke Skywalker is searching for a way to learn more about the Jedi, now that he's had a taste of what can be accomplished with The Force.  Doctor Aphra is a rogue archaologist who used to work for Darth Vader and has managed to get her hands on the archived (Read: Imprisoned) personality of an ancient Jedi that she can't access.  They've met before and are sort of frenemies.  

So there's the background.  Let's do this!

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TOR #1

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I'm not a big fan of The Avengers for the same reason I'm not a big fan of The Justice League.  I like individual characters on both teams, but it just seems like a failing proposition to keep coming up with stories that can present a challenge to a combined team of the mightiest heroes on Earth.  It all just sort of reeks of fan service, and I prefer lower-key super heroics.  

BUT. . .

I seem to be in the minority when it comes to comics starring laughably overpowered super-teams,  and that's okay. . .I just pass 'em by and read what I like.  But I occassionally make an exception.  Case in point being the 4 issue Avengers: Millennium series at hand.  My local comic shop had all four issues bundled for 5 lousy bucks with that SWEET cover for issue #1 on top.  I may not buy Avengers on the regular, but 4 issues for 5 bucks with at least one cover to make my office wall comic art rotation was a deal I couldn't refuse.  

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That's right.  More one shots! What can I say? I love 'em.

Let's do this!


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Anyone who's been reading this blog for a while knows I have a love for the one shot.  Those tasty little bites of comic book tapas where the creative team has a single issue to tell a whole story.   You never know what you're going to get with a one shot. . .sometimes they hit it out of the park, other times it's a foul ball.  Wait. . .how did I go from food comparisons to baseball?


One shots! Let's do this!

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After the Golden Age of horror comics (the 1950's) came to a screeching halt (thanks to the Comics Code Authority), pretty much any comic book horror material was to be found in titles slipping through a CCA loophole in the form of larger-sized black and white "magazines".  

But in the 1970's, publishers began to push against the CCA and there was a major resurgence of horror comics in color. . .Swamp Thing, Werewolf by Night, Tomb of Dracula, and many others.  Unfortunately, the horror resurgence was pretty short-lived and didn't really last far into the 1980's.

From what I understand, the short life of the 1970's horror resurgence was mostly due to the fact that the comics weren't particularly horrific. . .99% of them would more properly be described as "Supernatural Comics" rather than "Horror Comics", mainly because they still adhered to the CCA even though they were skirting around the edges of it.  

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Here we are. . .the end of the trail for DC's post-apocalyptic Jonah Hex.  The final 6 issues.

I have to admit, they were a little hard to get through. But giving people comic book reviews they never asked for is what I do. So let's get it done!


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After a pretty good start, can DC's post-apocalyptic fish out of water Jonah Hex series manage to stay on the rails for another 6 issues? Let's find out!


DC (1985 - 1987)

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Face front, true believers! It's another Retro Review edition of Longbox Junk as we take a trip back to 1967 for some Merry Marvel Mutant Madness, guest starring the one and only Wisecracking Wallcrawler, The Sensational Spider-Man! 

Sit back and enjoy another comic review nobody ever asked for, brought to you by the Astounding Authorship (AND Humongous Humility) of yours truly!

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Their nuclear ravaged world NEEDED a hero. . .what it got was. . .HEX

THE SCENE: A meeting room at DC Comics.  The year is 1985.  Three members (who I won't name) of DC's Editorial and Executive staff sit around a table.  Smoke drifts through the air.

MAN #1: (coughs) So, anyway. . .you guys seen Road Warrior?

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