I write comic book reviews that NOBODY has ever asked for!
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Welcome back to Longbox Junk, home of comic reviews that nobody asked for!
Well, my friends. . .I'm finally done with it. For the past couple of months and 9 posts I've been taking a look at comics in my (and my daughter's) collection that are issue #175 as a way of celebrating my 175th Longbox Junk comic review.
This is the 10th and final "Variant" of the completely unnecessary and unasked for reboot and renumbered Longbox Junk #1. And SPOILER ALERT, it's the best of the bunch! Better yet, it's completely free, and if you aren't 100% satisfied, you'll get a full refund!
It's not every day that you get to experience such a spectacular moment in the history of comic reviewin', folks. . .so let's dispense with the long introduction and get right into this thing, shall we?
We shall!
LONGBOX JUNK #1
SPECIAL COLLECTOR EDITION
VARIANT X
PREMIUM BLANK
OGDEN, UTAH
FLEA MARKET
SIGNED EXCLUSIVE!
SCRIPTS: Atom Baum
PENCILS: Atom Baum
COVER: Atom Baum
As usual, before we get inside, let's take a short look at the cover.
It's a bee-yoot, if I DO say so myself! The minimalist expression of my lack of artistic talent is staggering in its implications. Thank I at least know how to use Microsoft Paint at an amateur level or the whole thing would be as white as a Utah NRA meeting. An outstanding effort to say the least. And I'm sayin' the least.
MOVING ALONG!
Let's get into the story. . .
Hold on. Wait a minute. What's this?
*flips through the pages with his left eyebrow ever so slightly raised*
All these pages are blank! There's nothing here!
My friends, you're witnessing a landmark moment in comic books. Right here, right now. Feast your eyes on the FIRST "Blank Variant" that's actually completely blank!
That's right, son. . .
When I promise you a blank variant. You GET a blank variant!
Well, at least it's got a cover with a big red #1 on it, so speculators take notice! I'm counting on the value of this unique collector's item to spike so high that I'll FINALLY be able to afford a single Disneyland ticket (apologies to my daughter, but Papa needs some Star Wars).
CONCLUSION
All jokes aside, my sincere thanks to the readers of this blog. There aren't a lot of comments, but I can see from the view count that there's plenty of eyes on this merry mess of comic reviews that nobody asked me for. . .so even if you don't say anything, I'd like to take this opportunity to show my appreciation and let you know that there's PLENTY more Longbox Junk to come.
Up Next. . .
NOT another Longbox Junk #1 "Variant"
Be there or be square!
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On a serious note, I'm sure I speak for many in stating that we appreciate your fantastic, entertaining reviews. The Internet is filled with lots of stuff that many of us are trying to ignore these days (well, I guess many of us have been trying to ignore reality for a good long time...even before the Internet...it's why we read comic books!), and you provide a gleaming light of goodness for our favorite hobby.
Atom, many thanks for the countless hours you've spent typing away on the keyboard to provide succor for your many fans here at ComicBookRealm and abroad at your official Longbox Junk! site.
One question though...does the blank variant also have a trade dress blank variant, a virgin blank variant, a holographic blank variant, and so on.....?